WASHINGTON, DC – Republicans in Congress have pledged an additional $20 billion to Amazon founder Jeff Bezos for no specific reason whatsoever. This comes in response to Maria Cantwell’s (D-WA) request for […]
SAN FRANCISCO, CA – House Speaker Nancy Pelosi reportedly suffered from a severe ice cream headache Wednesday after voraciously consuming an entire pint of Häagen-Dazs butter pecan ice cream. “I was in […]
ATLANTA, GA – In what lawmakers say is a move to satisfy her insatiable desire to kill, Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) has been appointed a Georgia State Executioner. “We figured it’s […]
WASHINGTON, DC – House democrats on Thursday introduced legislation that would lower the cost of Häagen-Dazs by 30% in an effort to make the frozen treat more affordable for middle class Americans. […]
WASHINGTON, DC – An an effort to rejuvenate the struggling American economy and jump start the financial markets, the United States Senate has passed a $2 trillion stimulus package that includes a […]
