Author Archives
Satirist, Filmmaker, Person
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“Mayor Pete” Buttigieg Surges in GOP Polls
WASHINGTON, DC – South Bend, IN mayor Pete Buttigieg is now neck and neck with President Donald Trump in the latest CNN poll of likely republican voters. The surprising results reflect a 28-point jump in support for Buttigieg, with Trump… Read More ›
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OBSTRUCTION! COLLUSION!
WASHINGTON, DC – The full 448-page partially redacted Report on the Investigation into Russian Interference in the 2016 Presidential Election, or Mueller Report, was released to Congress and the public today. OBSTRUCTION! According to MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow, the report- “RUSSIA!… Read More ›
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Florence Cathedral Slated for Demolition Due to Safety Concerns
FLORENCE, ITALY – Saying that the disastrous fire at the Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris served as a wake up call, officials in Florence have identified over 25 structures that pose a risk to safety, including the iconic Cathedral of… Read More ›
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Eiffel Tower Feeling Pretty Cocky Right Now
PARIS – Upon hearing the news that the iconic Notre-Dame de Paris cathedral is currently ablaze, the Eiffel Tower has admitted that it’s feeling pretty good right now. “Well, would you look at that”, said the 1063-foot wrought iron lattice… Read More ›
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Ken Marino Still Wants to Dip Balls in It
LOS ANGELES – According to those close to Ken Marino, known for his roles in the feature films Love for Rent, Wanderlust, and Wet Hot American Summer, as well as television shows The State, Party Down, and Marry Me, the… Read More ›
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Kim Kardashian Studying to Become Lawyer in Hopes of Someday Defending OJ
Los Angeles – Like father, like daughter; Kim Kardashian is studying to become a lawyer in hopes of someday defending OJ Simpson in a murder trial. “My father Robert Kardashian was a lawyer, and I’ve always admired and respected the… Read More ›
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Bernie Sanders Under Fire for “How to Dupe the Public” Book Sales
Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders is under fire for reporting that he is now a millionaire due to royalties from his book How to Dupe the Public (by Pretending to Give a Sh*t About Their Problems). Ahead of releasing his tax… Read More ›
