Author Archives
Satirist, Filmmaker, Person
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Democratic Listmaker Unsure if de Blasio Should Go Under B or D
WASHINGTON, DC – Stan Doolittle was hired by the DNC last fall. It is his job every morning to scan the news looking for new candidates to add to official DNC lists and to update the 2020 Democratic Primary Wikipedia… Read More ›
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De Blasio Looks at 2020 Candidate Field, Thinks ‘Yeah, I Should Run’
NEW YORK – Looking over a list of 23 democrats currently running for president, New York Mayor Bill de Blasio thought to himself, “Yeah, I should definitely run for president”. The mayor, who has a 36% approval rating in New… Read More ›
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DeVos Worried that Students Not Shooting at Grade Level
WASHINGTON, DC – Citing concerns over accuracy, Education Secretary Betsy DeVos is worried that American students are not shooting at grade level. “I’m becoming increasingly concerned about our education system,” said the Secretary, adding “what we’re seeing is that many… Read More ›
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Biden Unveils Campaign Slogan: Make America Moral Again, Return to the Essence of Who We Are, the Dignity of a Country, the Dignity of People Treating our People with Dignity
WASHINGTON, DC – Former Vice President and democratic presidential hopeful Joe Biden unveiled his campaign slogan during an interview on ABC’s Nightline. The new slogan, Make America Moral Again, Return to the Essence of Who We Are, the Dignity of… Read More ›
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Majority of Dems Want Hillary Clinton to Run Again, Says Hillary Clinton
CHAPPAQUA, NY – Citing a lukewarm response to all twenty-two democratic presidential candidates, a majority of democrats are calling for Hillary Clinton to enter the race, according to Hillary Clinton. “Hillary Clinton won the popular vote in the 2016 election,… Read More ›
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Boeing Execs Thrilled to Learn Russian Crash Plane Not 737
CHICAGO – Sitting anxiously in an executive break room as CNN reported news that an airliner carrying 78 souls crash-landed in a fireball at Moscow’s Sheremetyevo International Airport, Boeing Executives were relieved to discover that the crashed Aeroflot plane was… Read More ›
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Frustrated Dems Launch ‘Draft Tim Kaine’ Movement
WASHINGTON, DC – Citing a lack of viable candidates in the 2020 democratic presidential race, disillusioned democrats have coalesced around senator and former vice presidential candidate Tim Kaine. Although he has not formally announced his candidacy, pressure is mounting for… Read More ›
