Politics

Kyle Rittenhouse In Hot Water After Shooting Three Ukrainian Freedom Fighters

KYIV, UKRAINE – Kyle Rittenhouse is under fire for reportedly shooting three Ukrainian freedom fighters while defending a Kyiv car dealership against Russian invaders. News of the shooting comes just days after the 19 year old vigilante voluntarily mobilized himself to protect Ukrainian interests against the Russian Army who launched an offensive into the country on February 24th.

“Instead of sit idly by and watch as Russia brutalizes another nation, American hero Mr. Rittenhouse took it upon himself to go to the Ukraine and take up arms against the aggressors,” Fox New’s Tucker Carlson told Beet Press. “Unfortunately, he had to defend himself against what he saw as a legitimate threat. These things happen.”

According to eyewitnesses, the Illinois native was approached by a small group of Ukrainian freedom fighters who asked [in Ukrainian] who he was, and what he was doing there. Mistaking the foreign speech for Russian, Rittenhouse opened fire, hitting three and killing two of the men. Rittenhouse claims that he acted in self defense.

Prosecutors are considering leveling manslaughter charges against Rittenhouse, but lawyers for the teenager are confident he will be cleared of any wrongdoing, saying “Mr. Rittenhouse saw that these men were armed, he thought these men were Russian, and he thought that they intended to harm him. In the fog of war, it’s sometimes difficult to identify an enemy. What Kyle did was heroic, his intentions were in the right place. He did nothing wrong.”

The three men shot by Rittenhouse, Artem Zahorsky, Georgiy Stadnik, and Pavlo Olesky, have been described by friends as proud Ukrainians ready to defend their nation. But United States media pundits are quick to point out that all three men have troubled pasts. “What’s known is that all three men were alcoholics,” said political commentator Sean Hannity. “In addition, Georgiy Stadnik is known to have hit his wife, and Pavlo Olesky did time in prison. So essentially, these guys were scumbags who got what they deserved.”

As of press time, Beet Press has confirmed that Rittenhouse has been invited to be the guest of honor at former President Trump’s March 13th rally in Florence, SC and has received a lifetime membership to the American Conservative Union.

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