Political Briefs

US Sets Record of Six Hours Without War

WASHINGTON, DC – Just hours after the end of the war in Afghanistan, the United States has set a new peacetime record marking the longest period of time the nation has gone without being involved in an active armed conflict. “Our mission in Afghanistan is over, and our brave troops are on their way home,” President Joe Biden said in a televised address to the nation, adding “and now, six hours and twenty-three minutes after the conclusion of hostilities in Afghanistan, America has entered it’s longest continuous era of peace since it’s founding.” This record breaks the previous record of five hours fifty-seven minutes of peacetime between World War II and the Korean War. As of press time, Biden had retreated to the White House situation room to order large-scale drone strikes on ISIS-K, and oversee the sale of over $750 million in Joint Direct Attack Munitions to Israel.

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