WASHINGTON, DC – In a move liberals are calling “surprisingly progressive” and “a breath of fresh air,” President Joe Biden has announced that he has set a goal to double student debt by 2024 – a marked increase from the expected $10,000 boost. “For far too long, our nation’s students and young adults have had to grapple with crippling financial freedom. Many have to make the though choice between supporting their local economy, purchasing a new home, or saving for their retirement,” explained Biden. “I’m proud to announce, those days are finally over. We’re going to ensure that by the end of my first term, all young Americans will have the debt they deserve to remain forever enslaved as an undervalued cog in a cruel economic machine.” According to experts, the plan will nearly double the average student debt held by American borrowers from $37,000 to nearly $60,000 and increase interest rates as much as 11%.