Politics

Evidence emerges Andrew Cuomo created Covid-19 to boost public image

ALBANY, NY – A stunning report released by New York Attorney General Letitia James is giving clear evidence that New York Governor Andrew Cuomo created Covid-19 in an attempt to bolster his public image and further his political career.

“It has come to our attention that the Governor created the coronavirus in order to seem like the adult in the room, in contrast to the Trump administrations inevitable mishandling of the pandemic,” explained James. “He used a deadly virus to springboard his political standing within the Democratic Party in hopes of gaining a high-level cabinet position, or even a VP nod in 2024.”

The report explains that Cuomo created the virus by mutating a rare strain of SARS in a makeshift laboratory set up in his garage. The then traveled to Wuhan Province, China to run trials of the virus. Once satisfied with the results, he released the virus in several major American cities including New York City.

From March to June 2020, as the virus spread to every corner of the nation, millions of Americans tuned into daily briefings held by Governor Cuomo where he touted his state’s swift response to the epidemic and offered a sharp counterpoint to the Federal Government’s response, often taking jabs directly at President Trump.

Sources close to the Governor have said that as the death toll began to climb, particularly in New York nursing homes, Cuomo panicked and hid statistics related to the number of fatalities from officials.

“Here you had Governor Cuomo, on top of the world, reassuring Americans that he had everything under control, when in reality, he created the whole problem to begin with, and he was losing his ability to control it,” said CNN political commentator Chris Cillizza. “But you’ve got to give him credit for thinking outside the box. I’m reminded of when Elizabeth Warren invented sub-prime mortgages just so she could gain some political cred creating the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau after the 2008 financial crisis.”

“This is why people don’t trust politicians,” said Brooklyn resident Tammy Stowe. “This is just as bad as when George Bush and Rudy Giuliani orchestrated 9/11 just to look like heroes. They should all go to Hell.”

As of press time, BeetPress has confirmed that the Biden administration has nominated Cuomo to be the next Secretary of Health and Human Services.

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