Political Briefs

Pelosi suffers ice cream headache

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – House Speaker Nancy Pelosi reportedly suffered from a severe ice cream headache Wednesday after voraciously consuming an entire pint of Häagen-Dazs butter pecan ice cream. “I was in one of my moods, so I made a bee line to one of my ice cream freezers, pulled out a pint and went kind of overboard,” explained Pelosi, still grimacing from the sharp pain in her forehead. “I never seem to learn. I’ll try to be more careful next time.” Following the incident, Pelosi issued a statement denouncing House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy for blocking passage of the Pelosi Act and allowing Marjorie Taylor Greene to be a batshit lunatic.

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