Politics

Confident Pete Buttigieg enters debate stage on white stallion

MANCHESTER, NH – A confident Pete Buttigieg took the stage at St. Anselm College’s Thomas F. Sullivan Arena perched upon a white stallion on Friday to debate fellow democratic candidates before Tuesday’s New Hampshire Primary.

“After my big win in Iowa, I’m just feeling great. I thought it would make a big statement if I entered the stage on this beautiful and gracious stallion,” said Buttigieg prior to the debate. “His name is Milky Way.”

While there are questions about the results of the Iowa Caucuses, most news networks have reported that the former South Bend mayor won by two State Delegate Equivalents (SDE’s) while Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders won the popular vote.

“By making such a grand entrance, Mayor Pete is showing his dominance over the other candidates,” commented CNN’s Chris Cillizza, adding “he’s really embracing his front-runner status and I think such a display is only going to bolster his support.

As of press time, BeetPress has confirmed that after seeing Buttigieg’s debate performance, an additional 15 billionaires have made maximum donations to Buttigieg’s campaign.

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