Biden to Youth: Voting is Lame

DES MOINES, IA – At a Presidential Youth Forum held at Roosevelt High School in Des Moines, former Vice President Joe Biden addressed a crowd of approximately 600 high school seniors, college students, and young adults to lay out the case that voting is a waste of time.

“Look, I know you kids gave up your afternoon to be here, and I really appreciate it, but my question is why?” Biden explained to the attendees, continuing “Don’t you have better things to do?”

Hosted in partnership between The Des Moines Register and the Des Moines Public Schools, the Iowa Youth Voice Forum was a unique opportunity for young people to engage with the candidates directly on the issues that impact them most.

“You’re all, what, 17, 18, 19?” asked Biden. “You don’t want to listen to some old geezer talk about healthcare reform or middle class tax cuts or get involved in some sort of Yang Gang. You should be out playing Atari or Nintendo or whatever, talking to your friends on MySpace or AOL instant messenger.”

As the puzzled students looked on, the candidate laid out several reasons why the students should skip voting.

“Come on, life’s too short to be reading voter pamphlets and showing up to caucus. Do you know how much time that takes? Fellas, do you think you’re going to impress girls by voting? There are so many better things to spend your time and energy on. Go to the drive-in, go see a movie. Listen to your records,” instructed Biden.

The message seems to be resonating with the attendees with University of Iowa sophomore Katie Lakin telling BeetPress “At first, I was super into the idea of voting and making my voice heard, but Joe Biden made a great point that I’m just one of a hundred million people, so my vote wouldn’t really count anyway. I think I’m going to take his advice and hang out at the mall with my friends instead.”

The former Vice President concluded his statements by saying “Listen, you can vote all you want when you’re old and have nothing better to do, but you won’t be young forever. Go out, have fun, and live your lives. Trust me when I tell you this, voting is lame.”

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