Your Aunt: So Many Great Candidates

ERIE, PA – As she prepared snacks and drinks in advance of the fifth democratic presidential primary debate, your aunt declared that there are so many great candidates.

“There are so many options, I’m really looking forward to hearing what they have to say tonight,” stated your aunt, adding “there are just so many great candidates.”

According to your aunt, she’s really taken an interest in Minnesota Senator Amy Klobuchar and Mayor Pete Buttigieg, saying “I’ve always liked Joe Biden and I think he’d be a great president, but it’s nice to see some of the younger folks up there who can bring some excitement into the presidential race. That Pete Buttigieg just sounds so polished and dignified when he speaks; he could really bring the country back together.”

Your aunt then listed defeating Donald Trump and healing the nation as her top priorities in the upcoming election.

Other candidates that have gained your aunt’s favor in the past few months include Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren and former Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Julian Castro. “I really like that Elizabeth Warren has a plan for everything, and it’s about time we have a woman president, and Julian Castro could really appeal to the hispanics,” your aunt reported.

When asked her opinion on Senator Bernie Sanders, your aunt winced and that she thought he seemed too angry all the time.

“Right now, I think my top choices are Mayor Pete, Elizabeth Warren, and Joe Biden, but that could change,” admitted your aunt, who continued, “I think Kamala Harris would be an excellent choice as well. It’s going to be really tough to choose one, but I’ll end up supporting whoever wins the nomination.”

As of press time, BeetPress has learned that your uncle is still very much committed to voting for Donald Trump.



Categories: culture, Politics, Satire

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