DNC Creates Super-Duper Delegate, Just in Case

WASHINGTON, DC – The Democratic National Committee has announced the creation of a super-duper-delegate to deploy in the event second-ballot voting doesn’t select a nominee during a brokered convention.

After calls for reform by progressives following the 2016 democratic primaries, in which Hillary Clinton was chosen to lead the party’s ticket in the general election, the DNC changed its rules to only allow superdelegate voting in the second round of voting in the event that first round voting fails to nominate a candidate with a 50% +1 vote majority. Superdelegates were seen by many as unfair to the democratic system, with these unpledged delegates giving Clinton a 359 to 8 point lead over Bernie Sanders before the first primary votes were cast – a fact that the mainstream media capitalized on giving Clinton the front-runner status out of the gate.

DNC Chair Tom Perez explained the move to BeetPress, saying “the democratic party is fortunate to have so many talented individuals in the race, folks like Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris, Mayor Pete, Beto, Amy Klobuchar, Julian Castro, and Cory Booker. With so many solid contenders, it might be difficult for one to reach the 50-percent threshold to become the presumptive nominee.”

Perez continued “if we can’t decide on a nominee after that first round of voting, we’ll move to the second round, and that’s when the supers will come in. But let’s say there’s a three-way split with the supers, and we’re still unable to pick a candidate, that’s when we’ll bring in the super-duper delegate.”

According to the DNC, the super-duper delegate will be the previous party nominee and will comprise 50% of the vote in the third round of voting.

“After three rounds, folks are going to be pretty restless and ready to wrap things up so they can get to sleep,” said Perez, “so our goal is to expedite the process and pick the best candidate to beat Donald Trump. As long as whoever the super-duper delegate picks has the support of at least one other delegate, then that person will be the nominee.”

Details released by the DNC state that each candidate will have the opportunity for a five-minute closed door meeting with the super-duper delegate to make their case, but the super-duper delegate may choose anyone she sees fit.

“An outcome may be that the super-duper delegate chooses someone who, let’s say, endorsed her in the previous election, or perhaps, she may nominate herself. As long as one other delegate casts their vote for Hillary, she’ll be the nominee,” Perez remarked.

The move is being hailed by democrats, including CNN’s Chris Cillizza who said “this is great news and shows that the democratic party is committed to fairness and transparency, and ready to win big in 2020. This eliminates the threat of someone like Bernie Sanders spoiling it for Elizabeth Warren, or Kamala Harris, and I, for one, couldn’t be more excited.”



Categories: Politics, Satire

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  1. 2:00PM Water Cooler 9/19/2019 – Breaking Worldwide News
  2. 2:00PM Water Cooler 9/19/2019 - News Views
  3. 2:00PM Water Cooler 9/19/2019 – Viral News Connection

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